“Then Peter came to Him and asked, “Lord, how many times will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him and let it go? Up to seven times? “Jesus answered him, “I say to you, not up to seven times, but seventy times seven.” (Matthew 18:21-22 Amplified Bible)
As I was teaching each of our church’s three Bible Study classes this week, I asked the students to read passages that validated Jesus’ prediction that His disciples would be delivered to courts, flogged in the synagogues, and that they would stand before governors and kings for His sake, as a testimony to them. We looked at this from the beginning of the persecution faced by the early church to the present times where in certain areas of the world, Christians are still being pursued and victimized. One example we looked at in the scriptures was the stoning of Stephen, a fate he suffered as a result of his preaching the longest sermon recorded by Luke, the author of The Book of Acts. After he had been driven out of the city where they stoned him, Stephen cries out to the Lord with a loud voice, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” His words were very similar to Jesus’ words at His crucifixion on Calvary, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.” In the case of Stephen and the case of the Savior, even though their persecutors had not changed their stiff-necked, obstinate, and resisting hearts, they had the ability to forgive.
Many people today do not live up to forgiving others. Instead, they hold grudges. Sometimes I think the grudge is ridiculous, especially when there is dislike or even hatred for someone because another individual wronged another. That’s right, it is not because of something they suffered, but someone else. Such persons hold the grudge even though the people involved directly in the incident have forgiven each other and or at peace. Forgiveness is always better than allowing a grudge to reside in one’s heart. Actually, it is a sin.
This topic was so interesting to me because I see grudges interfering with interpersonal relationships and preventing one to be at peace with others. I read several articles and scriptures, including the one above and below. One of the articles I read was written by Blair Parke in 2023. He provides some good lessons about forgiving and forgetting. Here is an excerpt from his published article.
“Raise your hand if you have ever been accused of holding a grudge. If you didn’t raise your hand, we all could take a lesson from you on forgiving and forgetting. A grudge is defined as “being unwilling to give or admit: a feeling of deep-seated resentment or ill will.” It is something probably everyone has experienced at some point, either being the victim of a grudge or being the person holding a grudge. Grudges can go from being minor (sibling rivalry, healthy competition) to borderline dangerous (thoughts of harming someone or seeing their demise in some way). When we hold a grudge, we justify having the grudge because that person wronged us in some way or just irritates us with all their blessings and/or behavior. However, the Bible shows that holding a grudge is not what we are called to do as followers of Jesus. We are called to forgive people for the wrong they have done for us and to love them as God loves them. “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors” (Matt. 6:12).
If you are holding a grudge, acting as if you have lived a perfect life and have not benefitted from recognizing the Lord showing you grace, mercy, love, and forgiveness, I will tell you something that will make your life better; something that will reduce anxiety and even relieve the unconscious guilt that you may have for feeling the grudge like you do. Here’s my condensed advice, compacted in three words, “Let it go!”
Have a great day! Hopefully you will find your way to worship and be in the special presence of the living God, the only true God. Be blessed!
“Get rid of all bitterness, passion, and anger. No more shouting or insults, no more hateful feelings of any sort. Instead, be kind and tender-hearted to one another, and forgive one another, as God has forgiven you through Christ.” (Ephesians 4:31-32 Good News Translation)
Committed to the climb,
Mark L. King