“Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. Relieve the troubles of my heart and free me from my anguish. Look on my affliction and my distress and take away all my sins. See how numerous are my enemies and how fiercely they hate me! Guard my life and rescue me; do not let me be put to shame, for I take refuge in you.
May integrity and uprightness protect me, because my hope, Lord, is in you.” (Psalm 25:16-21 NIV)
Thirty-three years ago, the oldest member of our church, at that time, was 87 years old, and she resided in an apartment in a nearby senior citizens living complex. Aside from her talking bird, she lived alone. Occasionally, per her request, I would visit with her, sit, converse, and consume her wisdom about life and the wisdom she acquired over her long years of living.
One of the things she said is worth sharing with you. She said, “Alone and lonely are two different things.” I’m now 75 years old, so as you would imagine, those words did not resonate with me 33 years ago, like they do today. Yet, last week, her statement surfaced in my mind. I suppose that statement was to help me personally, a retiree, no longer benefitting from the daily socialization and interaction that occurs in the workplace, and to help me as a pastor, minister to those who were once surrounded by many voices in the house, but now are left behind by those who have gone home to be with the Lord or where one becomes a true empty-nester, surrounded by rooms that have been repurposed and no longer ring with the sound of younger voices.
I think what the member was trying to tell me was that believers are never alone, and if loneliness tries to invade your earthly alone situation, and it tries to pull you down to the point of depression, remember that the Lord said He would never leave us or forsake us.
You can live alone but evade loneliness by engaging in communion with the Lord through prayer and study of the scriptures. Add on to that, the fact that the Holy Spirit will keep you company. He dwells within you. Alone is a state of being by yourself. Loneliness is a different state; a state where we have letdowns, meltdowns caused by self-pity, and smack downs by the inability to interact with others as we once did “back in the days.” Being alone does not mean we can’t have victory over Satan’s attempt to use sadness to overtake our gladness in the Lord.
We might fight some kind of battles, seemingly alone, but that is on us. We just need to do like the Psalmist above and the onslaught of loneliness can ousted. And listen, we belong to the body of Christ, and there are many opportunities to fellowship with a saint when not in church or with many believers in the assembly of the saints. Now, listen! Before you say something to the contrary, know for sure there is somebody in your church, in your network of believers who you can trust and confide. There is probably someone in the kingdom you know who has been through it all! Proactively engage in dialogue with that someone. Develop relationships with other believers. You may still be alone, by choice or because of circumstance, but you don’t have to be dragged down by the negative impact of loneliness.
You read the opening verses. Now read the closing verse and lift your head up, light up your face with a smile on your face, lastly, realize that in the flesh you may be alone, but as the songwriter said, really, you are never alone. Nevertheless, to stress the point: There is a difference between alone and loneliness. Meditate on these words. Then, help somebody or help yourself! Smile! Be blessed!
“Do not be afraid—I am with you!I am your God—let nothing terrify you! I will make you strong and help you; I will protect you and save you.” (Isaiah 41:10 Good News Translation)
Committed to the climb,
Mark L. King